Trusting the Test|Day 18

The reward for trusting him will be the salvation of your souls.
-1 Peter 1:9

January 23, 2018 was one of those days that you only hear about in movies. I remember waking up feeling like I didn’t know what would happen, but I knew that I would have to pray for a word from God to see me through. As usual with my coffee in tow and my Bible app opened, my friends and I decided to start a lesson plan surrounding the motto, “Finding Joy”. That means whatever you may be going through, no matter how difficult, try to find the joy of God within your storm. The lesson spoke of Paul and how he covered 4 major keys that can impact one’s joy; conflict, negative thinking, anxiety, and constant worrying. As I wrapped up the lesson, I made it a point to try and remember what I’d read in those moments when the enemy was up to one of his schemes. I would make it a point to search for God, my joy. Everyone’s relationship with God is different and I’d like to think that my relationship with God is full of love, humor and craziness. That crazy part (with the upmost respect) that I’ve come to love about Him so much would be displayed in its truest form as the morning would unfold. As I clocked in for work, I could feel the anxiety creeping in like dense fog, not to mention I was a bit anxious to speak with my manager for our monthly meeting. Since the phase-out of my job position due to technology updates, I was back on the phone taking calls. I went from working behind the scenes to direct contact with members and the change was unwelcomed and a bit frustrating. After 20 plus years of delivering customer service, I wanted more. I worked hard to advance and yet here I was again wearing the infamous headset. It felt like the shift that my pastor constantly talks about. If I had to define a spiritual shift, it would be the few times that your heart, mind and soul are all on one accord. A force so strong that it makes you become uncomfortable and the only way to gain any relief is to move! I could feel myself becoming uncomfortable in a position that cooperate America deemed my best attribute. After our meeting, the anxiety began to nest. Determined that I could deal with it and leave it up to God, I was met with the reality of possibly being evicted due to a lack of money because my husband was out of work. I tried calling and speaking with the leasing office agent who advised me that if we did not pay our rent (including the late fees) they would proceed with the eviction process. Clearly anxiety was having a party because negative thoughts began to swarm my mind. How would we get through this? Where would we go? I went to convey my concerns to my husband and was met with a deep-rooted tinge of anger at him instead. He was the reason we were in this mess I thought and right on cue, conflict crashed the scene. Voicing my concerns turned into a blame bashing of misdirected pain because this was not how I envisioned our lives after marriage. Constant struggling, ups and downs, and more. During my rant I hadn’t noticed that my dog became sick and that the commode became clogged. As I stood in the bathroom trying to unclog the commode, the day’s events, all within 5 hours might I add, came crashing down and I froze. I felt like I would collapse in exhaustion had I allowed my thoughts to take complete control of me. I had to remind myself that everything that transpired that day, from possible eviction to a sick a puppy was a life lesson review about trust and joy. So I centered myself, and spoke aloud, “I trust you Father”, apologized to my husband and let it go. Afterwards I decided I needed a pick me up and pulled from my inspiration jar. It’s almost like a direct line to God anytime I need an immediate response from Him. That day I happened to pull 1 Peter 1:9, “The reward for trusting him will be the salvation of your souls”. Later that day I was able to speak with the head
leasing agent who decided to work with us. Thank God! He came through, but not before the lesson was learned. We must always trust in the process, even when we don’t understand its purpose. Trust and find the joy in knowing that every single one of your test will become a testimony on the goodness of the Lord. Day by day, by and by, Lord we give it all to you.

-If you are in the middle of a test right now in your life, I want you with all of your heart to stand firm in your truth and tell God that I trust you! No matter how big or small, I know that you are working out everything for my good.